There may be women of that sort about, but I never met them. I don't think I should like them, for they must be dry, cold, unsympathetic, unemotional, unwomanly creatures.'
'Maude, you have loved some one else!'
'I won't deny that I have been interested deeply interested in several men.'
'Several!'
'It was before I had met you, dear. I owed you no duty.'
'You have loved several men.'
'The feeling was for the most part quite superficial. There are many different sorts and degrees of love.'
'Good God, Maude! How many men inspired this feeling in you?'
'The truth is, Frank, that a healthy young woman who has imagination and a warm heart is attracted by every young man. I know that you wish me to be frank and to return your confidence. But there is a certain kind of young man with whom I always felt my interest deepen.'
'Oh, you did discriminate?'
'Now you are getting bitter. I will say no more.'
'You have said too much. You must go on now.'
'Well, I was only going to say that dark men always had a peculiar fascination for me. I don't know what it is, but the feeling is quite overpowering.'
'Is that why you married a man with flaxen hair?'
'Well, I couldn't expect to find every quality in my husband, could I? It would not be reasonable. I assure you, dear, that taking your tout ensemble, I like you far the best of all. You may not be the handsomest, and you may not be the cleverest--one cannot expect one's absolute ideal,--but I love you far, far the best of any. I do hope I haven't hurt you by anything I have said.'
'I am sorry I am not your ideal, Maude. It would be absurd to suppose myself anybody's ideal, but I hoped always that the eyes of love transfigured an object and made it seem all right. My hair is past praying for, but if you can point out anything that I can mend-- '
'No, no, I want you just as you are. If I hadn't liked you best, I shouldn't have married you, Frank, should I?'
'But those other experiences?'
'Oh, we had better drop them. What good can it possibly do to discuss my old experiences? It will only annoy you.'
'Not at all. I honour you for your frankness in speaking out, although I acknowledge that it is a little unexpected. Go on.'
'I forget where I was.'
'You had just remarked that before your marriage you had love-affairs with a number of men.'
'How horrid it sounds, doesn't it?'
'Well, it did strike me in that way.'
'But that's because you exaggerate what I said. I said that I had been attracted by several men.'
'And that dark men thrilled you.'
'Exactly.'
'I had hoped that I was the first.'
'It was not fated to be so. I could easily tell you a lie, Frank, and say that you were, but I should never forgive myself if I were to do such a thing. You see I left school at seventeen, and I was twenty-three when I became engaged to you. There are six years. Imagine all the dances, picnics, parties, visitings of six years. I could not help meeting young men continually. A good many were interested in me, and I--'
'You were interested in them.'
'It was natural, Frank.'
'Oh yes, perfectly natural. And then I understand that the interest deepened.'
'Sometimes. When you met a young man who was interested several times running, at a dance, then in the street, then in the garden, then a walk home at night--of course your interest began to deepen.'
'Yes.'
'And then--'
'Well, what was the next stage?'
'Sure you're not angry?'
'No, no, not at all. Why don't you keep the key in the spirit- stand?'
'It might tempt Jemima. Shall I get it?'
'No, no, go on! The next stage was?'
'Well, when you have been deeply interested some time, then you begin to have experiences.'
'Ah!'
'Don't shout, Frank.'
'Did I shout? Never mind. Go on! You had experiences.'
'Why go into details?'
'You must go on. You have said too much to stop. I insist upon hearing the experiences.'
'Not if you ask for them in that way, Frank.' Maude had a fine dignity of her own when she liked.